Questions

Questions to Travel By

So, while we’re traveling I’m looking out the window. I am trying to make sure I pay attention to shifts in the landscape ‘cause – you know - I wanna make sure this is educational ‘n stuff. I have a tendency to get utterly absorbed in my embroidery, or my own head… and then Valisa says “wow, look at that beautiful something-or-other” which pulls me back to here-ness and I realize, “DAMNATION! We just drove over an entire mountain pass and I completely zoned out the WHOLE 13,000 FOOT HIGH 3 BAZILLIAN MILE STRETCH OF IT.

Sometimes… while I’m staring out the window, forgetting to pay attention, I am trying to figure out what exactly the four of us are doing on this crazy venture. It sort of feels like the most important project of my whole life… and, alternately, completely aimless. Sometimes I hear parental – type voices in my head saying things like:
“What the hell are you doing? Gallivanting across the country eh? Trying to find a place to live are ya? Sounds like a good excuse for a vacation if you ask me.”

Yeah. Don’t lie. You know you’ve thought it. You’ve seen the pictures haven’t you? Yesterday we explored Moab – checked out some petroglyphs. Today we hiked two miles to soak in Idaho hot springs.
Nope, I won’t deny it folks. We’re havin’ a real good time on this cross country jaunt of ours.

I don’t feel guilty about it, or defensive. But I don’t mind giving it a little consideration.

I’ve lived in a lot of places already. Kentucky, Colorado, Georgia, North Carolina, Louisiana. And I have family… community… in all of those spots. People who I would be completely satisfied to live and work with all the rest of my life.
I like the land in those areas too. I love listening to the cicadas in the summertime in Georgia. I love when the rain is warm. Hell, I even love humidity… when the air around me has a body of its own. I adore Rhododendrons. Yes. I know. They’re invasive - I’m supposed to hate them… but I don’t. I even enjoy Kudzu.
I love the jungley denseness of the Mountains in North Carolina. I love the open space and the high that takes my breath away in Colorado.
Kentucky… I’m not gonna talk about the hills or the horses, cause that’s cliché - but I was born in Kentucky. My family is there. It will always be my home.
New Orleans… well… I’m not about to defend the aesthetics of the Fast Track Betting parking lot, but I am in love, infatuation, lust, reality-pulled-out-from-under-me, did I mention IN LOVE with my friends and the work they are doing there.

So what the hell am I doing using up all these fossil fuels… burning the blood of the mother – so that I can see if there’s something out there… better?

Bad.
Bad hippie.

Do I think I’m gonna be skipping along and all of a sudden I’ll just trip and fall – slam dunk – into a bowl of Jesikan Utopia? And even better… It’s not just Jesikan Utopia, but Benjan Utopia… and Valisan Utopia… and (Bryan doesn’t fit the flow so well does he? Brian-ian Utopia?) anyway… Tahz, and Shannon, and Lali, and Kiki, and Laura, and Josh… and alla ya’ll. You’re all gonna slam dunk into the Utopian mush pot with me right? And we’ll all move in together and live happily ever after?

I know I’m sweet and giggly… but I’m not quite that naive.

So… why can’t I just settle down somewhere nice, get an exciting job - teaching teenaged derelicts - and start growing carrots or something?

Is it ‘cause I really want a vacation with my friends? Nope.
Is it cause I’m a gypsy at heart and the wind owns my soul?
Yeah right. I wish I were that glamorous.
Is it ‘cause everyone else thought it was a good idea - and I just took a flying leap onto the band wagon?
Hell no. You think I can’t make up my own mind?
Sorry – I even push my own buttons sometimes.

So… where were we? I think this was the part where I had intended to bring it all together and answer the question - or at least pull something that sounded generally grounded and intelligent outta my ass.

But… uh…. sometimes the Goddess leaves me hangin’. Right now – sittin’ on a green carpet in Darby, Montana - in the guest bedroom of Valisa’s first cousin once removed - I am definitely danglin’ for an answer.

I think it’s prob’ly one’a them gol’ durned spirichul thangs.

Valisa, Brian, and Benja and me… we’re just listenin’ to God over here ya’ll.
How ‘bout let’s have a little faith and stop askin’ so many questions ok?

I’m being serious by the way. Just in case you weren’t sure.
Of course, as always, my opinions do not necessarily reflect the opinions of anyone else in the Tuff Roots conglomerate. (That’s our working title.) The Tuff Roots part – not the conglomerate. I only added that just now ‘cause it sounded cute.

Oh, we now (also) have official traveling titles. Here they are:

Brian: Brioscorea Basoria (I have no idea how to spell it, but you should say it in Latin)
Jes: Death Bunny
Valisa: Dark Fire
Benja: Skinny White Buffalo

Let’s also just take a moment to give thanks for Valisa and her cousin once removed, Nathan, and this beautiful house that he built PRACTICALLY BY HIMSELF out of trees burned in the big Montana fires - and guest bedrooms with green carpets.
And all of you – who we love and talk about constantly - while we’re at it.